Just kidding. But if I ever need health insurance / a visa, I can be a very devoted husbandwife to you. In fact, should you lead me to the altar in order that I may fake my own identity or hide my raging homosexuality, I can offer you the following spousely services:
I shall be the most 19th Century of husbands
Breakfast in bed
Once per month
(May refer to ‘loaf of stale bread thrown from a distance’)
Once per birthday
May consist …
It’s difficult for me to give this book 2 stars, because I wanted to like it: the premise was sound, the introductory chapters were good, and it’s important to support indy publishing. There’s also the fact that, as an indy author myself, I just plain don’t like giving bad feedback on someone else’s hard work. Despite all that, my frustration with this novel is still clawing at my brain like a fatal parasite, so I can’t avoid giving a below …
As my legions of devoted cultists are aware, I am not one for monogamy. To me, being with just one person for the rest of your life is like only ever eating one type of cereal, or only ever abducting one race of homeless person for your doomsday project. However, monogamy is the path for the majority, and as a self-dedicated “public servant” I shall devote myself to assisting the polyamory-impaired.
Now, despite pledging your genitals to the fumblings of your …
We at Redfern Enterprises are in love with love! We just adore seeing young couples gazing into each other’s eyes, holding hands, and making new generations of impoverished humans to buy our products and serve as test subjects! Romance!
But sometimes relationships slump – libidos and vital parts soften. How can you rekindle the romance? How can you revive the lust? How to stop your significant other from cheating on you with household pets? Well we’re here to help.*
So without further …
I think you’re an elitist. No offence, but you’re elitist as hell. Sorry, but could you stop being elitist just for one second? Seriously.
Why do I think you’re an elitist? Because somewhere inside your sexy box of values, you hold an opinion which doesn’t chime with the majority. Anti-capital punishment? Pro-same-sex adoption? Believe in giving rights to asylum seekers? Prisoners? Immigrants? (Notice these links come from different countries [USA; Brazil; Australia; USA again; UK] – we’ll get to that in a second).